The Votes Are In!

Hello all you fans out there. From the millions of votes cast, it turns out I look the most like Erik Estrada. Yes that is true. I am his #1 look-a-like. I get paid top dollar to turn up at events and pretend to be him. I got $25,000 last week just for an appearance. It's pretty sweet.

I can't believe people said I look like Dar Heatherington. Hello! I do not look like an alien. Can't you see the difference? I am a man. Pure man. No homo here. All 100% pure man meat. I guess thats what you get for working out 14 times a week. Twice a day, everyday! It really pays off. I have a washboard stomache and everything. The chicks really dig it.

So last week I attended one of Britney's comback shows. She is really trying to prove to the world that she still has it. I hate to diss my Britney, but she looks horrible. She's had 2 kids and is trying to pull off her look of 3 years ago. Hello! Extensions on that horrible head of hair look horendous! And her tummy hangs out over her clothes. Britney, you need a Bowflex. And maybe cut back on your southern fried chicken.

She looks so bad.